that should be me and I don't care if it's JB's song. well, Rascal Flatts is in it.
been through a lot lately. sometimes I'm just wondering why the hell is this all happening. been thinking does karma really exist? really? if it does, what goes around comes around is just not relevant anymore. if karma does exist, it's just being unfair to me. I should change it to 'what goes around, comes around and around and around and it'll just come again and beat you to death'. hmm, am I upset? I don't know. all I know is I'm alive. I'm human. with heart, feelings, intentions, fears. I'm just a guy and I do cry.
that should be me. I really wish that it is me right there. I wish that is me holding your hand, caressing your face, enjoying your smile, arguing with you, loving you the way I should, being there for you. I wish I can be around. that should be me, the one you love. that should be me, the one you try your best for. that should be me, the one you stay and wait around for. that should be me.
but that isn't me. no, that shouldn't be me. I'm not the one to have your feelings. I'm not the one you love. just hope you know that I love you and I don't know if there's any space in my heart that I don't wanna love you. I wish you're around. I wish I'm around but I guess I can't be anymore. there's just too much bullets that I've taken and still much more left to be offered. I've been strong for you. but I guess that's all I'm good at. being strong for someone. I'm just too weak, don't know how to be strong for myself. I really hope I can be strong enough to see you again because your smile, your smile is just so . . . .
