life when it fells apart : confusionists.

everyone has their own lives. they live it their way. some live it gracefully, some live it just okay, some live it sadly, some living it confusedly.

we know the stories of the people who lived gracefully, who lived just okay, who lived sadly. they're either in love or just the happy people, they're fine living their simple life or they're either living brokenheartedly or just haven't got enough for their life. but little do we know about those who lived confusedly. why? because even they themselves didn't know how to put it in words. confusions, uncertainties, hanging on a thread, just wanna feel the ground.

these people we know less. why? because we don't wear their shoes, we don't live their life. these people need help. but no one knows how. why? because these people normally give out helps. but something happened to them and they're just left lost, confused. too much helping others till others never think they need help.

the reality is, everybody need help. even the best of helpers can't help themselves. everyone needs help. nobody wants to end up confused. so help them. care for them because they used to care a lot about others. they used to care too much about others. they used to put others life first instead of themselves. they are just too used to it that they care not about themselves. what others need is what important to them. what others need is what they need. they just need to be needed.

so please, if anyone has ever put you first in their life, don't hurt them. you don't know how much they beat themselves up just for you. do you even know that they've already put their life in yours? your life is their life. if you're gone, their life follows you too. guess what else is left for them to live on? none. only confusion looms. so this is the story of the confusionists. please, be good to them. you know who they are. you know who will live confusedly because of you. think about them before you hurt them. suck up your pride before you hurt your parents, your family, the person who loves you. remember, your life is always their life.

the road not taken.

life offers you so many roads. you decide, you choose, you determine the road you walk. yeah, life does offer me so many roads. but for now there's only two roads ahead of me. and I'm just in confusion. the low road or the high road? my whole life, I never been thought on taking the low road. it is the easiest way but it's slippery and hard to steer. imagine you're driving on a slippery road. you drive fast, you might get caught in accidents and you might die. but if you're in a difficult situation, isn't dying the easiest way out? the low road, easy but deadly. yeah, at times I do feel like taking the easy way out. but that's just not me. maybe I'm tired of being me? i dont know.

the high road. that's what I always prefer. travel it with pride, sacrifice with might. on another day, it's easier for me to take this road, this hardships but right now I'm just afraid. afraid of taking it while knowing I might just fall. crushing down from so high, down so low. yeah, I know everything has its risk. when things are there to see, I know what's worth the risk and what's not. but now I'm just so caught up. I know the risk. I fell before. I know the hurt. I know I'll fall again. and it's all because of the high road. now tell me what's there waiting for me if I'm gonna fall?

so yeah, I'm just stuck here. in the junction between the high and low road. both I'm not eager to take. even turning back isn't an option. I hate this. I despise this. I need to move on. I need to choose my path. just where the hell should I go? can I just sit here in this junction waiting for help from up above? forget it. will there ever be a savior for me? or I'll just dig my grave here, right here where I'm stuck at.